Column Rejection #1?

I don't know if I should start numbering the rejection notices. It might become depressing. Or amusing. I'm also not sure whether this is a rejection or just a receipt of submission note, but seeing how it's several weeks after I sent the piece in (by e-mail), I'm guessing it's a rejection. Here's what I heard from The Washington Post:

"Thanks for your submission. We have hundreds already and can't reply indetail [sic] to everyone. If we can use your piece, or want to discuss it withyou [sic] further, we will contact you. Thanks again."

Not the most beautifully crafted of rejection letters, but I'm sure the intern who wrote it was quite busy. I particularly like the "we have hundreds already" part. Way to make a girl feel special! My poor little column, fighting for life in some giant pile, or worse, already the victim of the intern's delete button.

I figure I'm due for a lot of rejection. It's only fair. In my literary management days, I must have sent out hundreds of rejection letters. They fell into two categories; return with encouragement, and return without encouragement.

Return with encouragement was something like:

"Dear Ms. Hoover, Thank you for sending us your play, An Earthworm Went in my Mouth and I Ated It: Songs of Ralphie. While we couldn't find a place for it in our season, we did enjoy reading it, and hope you will continue to keep us informed of your work. Sincerely, Ruby Blue, Literary Manger, etc."

Return without encouragement went more like this:

"Dear Mr. Skinner, Thank you for sending us your play, Something Wicked This Way Strums: My Affair With an Evil Guitar Teacher. While we were not able to find a place for it in our season, we wish you well in all your literary endeavors. Sincerely, Ruby Blue, etc."

I would say my note from the Post was more the latter, no?

Progress Update #3

I finished the column! And I sent it in, a whole day before the cutoff! Now to wait for my first official rejection letter.

As a result of my finishing the column this morning, I have a very grouchy husband and baby to contend with. It's hard, all this prioritizing of time. I try to work in the middle of the night when they're sleeping, but it doesn't always happen.

On the other hand, yeay! I sent it in!

Now we're off for a day of fun and friends downtown.

Progress Update #2

I have finished my first draft of the column! Now to edit.

Okay, actually I finished my first draft 2 days ago but was away on a business trip with limited access and no time to edit. I couldn't sleep without getting it done, so I stayed up late into the night, and of course paid for it the next day when I could barely stay awake during my training.

I hope to send it out tomorrow (due Sunday at the latest), so my plan is to edit while my daughter naps tomorrow morning. I hope.

My husband and I had another one of those stupid conversations about how broke we are. Stupid because we have them practically every day, with no solution in sight, and a very depressing outlook. This adds yet more pressure to actually sell something. And the pressure makes it harder to write. Sigh.

Writing an Article in 20 Steps

1. Feel the urge to write something.
2. Sit at the computer. Get comfortable.
3. Open a Word document.
4. Stare.
5. Quickly bang out an opening sentence.
6. Quickly delete said opening sentence.
7. Check e-mail.
8. IM with friend who happens to be online.
9. Conclude conversation, telling friend you "must get to work."
10. Go to kitchen, prepare and consume snack.
11. Pace apartment, noting flaws in housekeeping. Consider doing a chore.
12. Return to computer, check forums for new messages.
13. Write a list of ways to procrastinate, and post list on blog.
14. Audition different colors for blog.
15. Read other blogs, chosen at random using "next blog" feature, to note color schemes.
16. Think about how you should learn a foreign language, because on your next trip the French/German/Italian fruit vendors will be so impressed when you order in their language.
17. Guiltily pull up Word document again and pour out some aimless drivel.
18. Edit.
19. E-mail to publisher.
20. You're done! You have finished your first column. Bask in the glory while contemplating the theme for your novel.

Progress Update #1

Last night I completed a draft of my column! I also re-read old columns until I fell asleep, somewhere around midnight, just before the baby woke up. And so it goes.

Of course I have some misgivings about my topic, but I'm going to continue to play with it and condense what I wrote, and see if I can get a good, funny column out of it. Or I still might scrap it altogether, but I have hope that it will work out. I hesitate to post about my ideas here for fear of stealing, so I may take this down later, but I'm currently writing about our first backpacking trip with Baby. It's amusing, and it's a contained incident, so there's not the whole cosmos full of ideas that I have to choose from.

In other news, this morning is Columbus Day, so Christopher's at work, and I'm playing SAHM with the baby. It's fun! She's napping, and I updated our family website, took out the trash, and ironed. I wish I had this time every day.

Tomorrow we leave for a 4-day work trip for me. Since I'm the main food source for Edythe and Christopher can telecommute, they are coming with me. I'm really, really pushing to get the column finished and submitted before we leave, which means all cleaning and packing need to happen during the day today, so I can write after she goes to bed. I am a whirling dervish of productivity!

Still no ideas about the novel.

Procrastination

The truly great thing about a new blog, especially a new blog one hasn't publicized to friends and family yet, is that one can waste a lot of time fiddling around with different colors and fonts. How can I expect to be inspired without a truly excellent background color? It's a good thing I don't know how to upload pictures yet.

My goal for the end of the weekend, which is technically Monday night due to Columbus Day, is to write my column for the Post, and decide on a topic for the novel. Yes.

The plan of attack includes reading this week's Washington Post Magazine, and rereading old columns I've enjoyed, to see what qualities I can discern that I can also incorporate into my column. But first I need to play with the colors again. And fold the laundry.

And now I am having an asthma attack.

Goals

I have given myself two deadlines, because I think they will help me to stay focused.

October 14: submit an original column to the Washington Post Magazine.

November 1-30: complete a novel for NaNoWriMo.